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The sex was hot and fast and noisy, a flurry of slapping skin, his moans, my
whimpers. I hadn t known I was capable of sex like that. Animal sex. There were a
thousand things I hadn t thought I was capable of, not until I d found the one key that
fit my lock. I came hard against his taunting fingertips, the deepest, scariest orgasm I ve
ever experienced. When I recovered, he urged me onto my back.
Regardez-moi.
I did as he ordered, eyes on his laboring muscles in the dim light leaking from the
living room. I watched the only man who d gotten to know my body this way, watched
him grow frenzied with lust until he couldn t hold on, then watched him succumb. He
ground our bodies together as he came, so hard my hip may bruise. If it does, I ll miss
the mark when it fades.
He tumbled from me in a sweaty heap, stripped the condom and grabbed me
around the middle. Powerful arms held me close, possessive and familiar, and after a
few wordless minutes Didier whispered, Spend the night.
90
Curio
I will.
He sighed and released me, rolling onto his back. Oh good.
You knew that already. I brought my pajamas.
Yes, but it s nice to hear it again. Perhaps I should hide all of your clothes and your
shoes, in case you change your mind&
I propped myself on my elbow and smiled at him. You really care that much about
my sleeping over?
Very much. I want to make you coffee. And see you with your wonderful curls, all
wild against my pillows.
My grin deepened.
I want to see you with your hair wet from the shower, and the morning light in
your eyes when you wake.
I hope everything he says is true. I hope he s not just lonely. Or that my company
only feels so good because he s forgotten what it s like having friendships and
romances, out in the real world. Then again, this flat is real. I ve had some of the most
genuine and eye-opening experiences of my life inside these walls. And damn it, I m
real, this night more than ever. Maybe I was alluring. Maybe I ought to quit letting my
decades-old insecurities dilute every wonderful thing he says and just fucking believe
the man.
I used the bathroom and put my pajamas back on. As I joined him in bed, the world
felt lovely. He wrapped his naked body around my satin-clad one, and he was my
boyfriend. I d dreamed of sleeping with a man exactly this way for half my life, and
here I finally was.
It really had been worth the wait.
* * * * *
I woke as the sun broke through the curtains, and I felt so much. Cool silk on my
skin, Didier s warm arm cradling mine, a sweet soreness between my legs once more. I
rolled over and stroked his chest until his eyes opened.
Good morning.
Hi. This is your chance to see me with my hair a mess, before I take a shower.
He tousled it, gaze taking me in. Very nice. Thank you. He squinted at the
window. My goodness, I don t know when I was last awake at daybreak. Or indeed
asleep by midnight.
Keep sleeping if you want. Do you want me to go down to the baker s and get us
breakfast?
That would be very nice, if you don t mind. Let me know when you re leaving,
and I ll bathe and make us coffee.
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Cara McKenna
I nodded and left him in bed, stealing a long look before I exited. This was exactly
how Didier ought to be styled stripped to the waist in the morning light, sage-green
sheets wrapped around his legs. Click, click, click went my mental camera.
It was nine by the time we d showered and dressed and pastries and coffee were
served in the living room. I picked at my croissant. Worry had caught up with me at the
bakery, right as I d handed my money to the clerk.
I need to talk to you about something, I said.
Didier set down his mug. Oh?
I shifted in my seat, addressing the hands fidgeting in my lap. I won t be able to
come by as often as I have. It has nothing to do with wanting to. Or from getting to
know you better, or the sex, or any of that.
His forehead wrinkled. All right&
I laughed sadly. I just can t afford to. My throat was tight, heart hurting to admit
aloud what we are, what s brought us together. I d let it become so much more in my
mind. Even in my gut. But it had always been just checks slipped in his mailbox, hadn t
it?
I m very sorry to hear that.
I nodded. I wasn t foolish enough to expect to be told I needn t pay, or that I
merited some discount. I didn t want to hear anything that underscored what a
transaction this entire arrangement was, behind the glittering veneer of romance.
I would always welcome your visit, no matter how infrequent, he said.
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